gra-tu-i-tous |grəˈt(y)oōitəs|
{ORIGIN mid 17th cent.: from Latin gratuitus ‘given freely,spontaneous’}
1. uncalled for; lacking good reason; unwarranted : gratuitous violence.2. given or done free of charge : gratuitous advice.
vi-o-let |ˈvī(ə)lət|{ORIGIN Middle English : from Old French violette} adjective:
1. a bluish-purple color seen at the end of the spectrum opposite red.
2. a herbaceous plant of temperate regions, typically having purple, blue,or white five-petaled flowers, one of which forms a landing pad for pollinating insects. Genus Viola, family Violaceae.
3. ME.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Occupy THIS, Bastards!

I will preface this blob with a disclaimer:
I do not care to watch the news, unless it is about kittens being rescued or seagulls shoplifting Cheeto's. The info I get and ponder- which may or may not be perceived as "news" is second, or third-hand at best. 

That being said, I still have a slew of gratuitous rantings to spew about the stuff I really do not care to know too much about. 

Movin' on Up?

Like this "Occupy" bullshit.

Is "Occupy" the new planking? 
It smells like the greener, uber-ivy-league-er planking, I'd venture to say.  

Upset at "The Man" and don't know why? 
Have a trust fund and secretly hate your family's prestige
Actually think that 100K is lower-middle-class income? 

Well, step right the fuck up *floks, 
and alleviate some of that over-abundant white guilt! 

You are HERE

Last Monday, as I drove down the illustrious streets built around Yale- in the meagre township also known as New Haven, I was extra p.m.s.-inspired to jaw on about the mock tent city which has sprouted up on the west end of the green for the better part of a long-ass time. 

(Remember readers: you asked for it!)

"Jesus F'n Christo! What the fucking fuck are these bone-heads up to? Reallly!?!? AND Just who in the hell is actually sleeping on the dang green? AND who can afford the luxury of loafing about? Jeeeez G., look at that big blue one- I bet that tent costs more than I make in 2 weeks! Occupy- my ass!..." G. concurred, so we bitched in unison for two more blocks. 

I was livid. I do not feel the need to OR care to hear these occupiers out. 
Do not pass "Go." 
Do not collect $200. 

Fuck Off, You Pituitary Case!

I really don't think that the tented voice of a generation is occupying anything but the outhouses that somebody is paying for! You want to hear about the actual 99 fucking percent? Call up Sallie Mae and ask them if they will reduce my loan payment, siting the 11-months of underemployment I struggled through and the year of couch-surfing I am winning a People's Choice Award (TM) for... 
99% of the time, you will be ignored, harassed and have my name and shady credit reported to the fuzz. 

So- fuck you imaginary do-gooders... Pay off my fucking loans! Stop buying overpriced crap nobody needs, inducing an overblown supply and demand free-market chaos economy! Send your condescending, preppy-assed kids to ghetto public schools & tell them that Higher Education is 99% a fucking joke! And would somebody- somewhere please tell celeb actors and athletes that they need to earn their wages. Some shit is really askew. Don't pay to see Rulia Joberts pretend to act "ugly" in the cinema. Do not save your pennies to own that pro ball jersey! The player has no clue who the fuck you are- do you see him sporting your name on his back? 
Come on United Statesians, get a clue, and update priorities! 

Spare a Square?

My grandparents must be turning over in their graves! They did not live off imaginary credit. If they couldn't afford the new thing- they did not get it. And if they really needed it, they worked asses off and saved. No sense of "you deserve everything NOW" self-entitled lie most floks believe. 
Fact: most of us do not deserve shit. Eat it up. And an extra pre-emptive fuck you for thinking this is harsh, if you in fact do think it harsh. I really do not care. 

What do I care about? Getting a safe and affordable place of my own to live and work in. 
Because "campin' out" is for weekends in the forest. 


You know, I think socio-economic reform needs to happen as much as the next impoverished surf does. But who is going to give up their comfy lifestyle- riddled with i-phones, i-pads, i-pods and high-speed interweb conex? Who is opting to ride the bus and give up their SUV or even forfeit their Prius-induced consciences? Don't see too many committing to embracing the 99 so-called percent... 

Sweet Relief

And since when does the "middle class" get to cry poor & whine about equality? 
Go recycle that bullshit to someone who is buying it. 
I'm not.

Let me break it down: 
If there were to be a revolution... 
A] it would not be televised. 
B] fluffy "occupiers" would be scared shitless by it's sheer force and dynamic energy.
C] it would not be lead by a bunch of ivy-leaguers. 

The real revolution belongs in the streets
It is borne of fire. 
Only those who dare to burn are willing to strike a match.    

*Floks: The new folks.
 Floks: also an en-title for folks who would rather not think for themselves... Enjoy! 
You deserve it!